“Hello,” I said. “I’m calling to see if you cover plastic surgery after a mastectomy.”

“What do you mean, plastic surgery after a vasectomy?” a female voice replied.

I gulped and tried again. “Does my insurance cover reconstruction after a mastectomy?”

“You mean, you want to reverse a vasectomy? she asked.

“No, no,” I said, struggling to go on. “I have breast cancer. I am going to have a breast removed. Will the insurance cover reconstruction of a new breast?”

“Oh,” she said, “Of course, of course.”

I hung up the phone and sat there, stunned. Then, I laughed. This cancer journey is going to have some absurd moments, I thought.

Now, almost 14 years later, I go around one-breasted, my children are in college, and I am grateful to still be laughing.

(This appeared in the magazine Heal: Living Well after Cancer, Vol.1, No. 2, Fall 2007)
© Pam Roberts